The $180,000 it will cost the Fairley High School band to perform at the FedEx Orange Bowl might as well have been $1 billion. That works out to $1,500 for each of the band’s 115 members to make the invitation-only trip to Miami for the Jan. 2 game, an amount that might as well have been $1 million.

At a school where 95 percent of the student body receives free or reduced lunch, coming up with so much money for an extracurricular opportunity seemed like a far-away dream.

Dreams, the Fairley band has learned first hand, come true.

Read the rest of Wendi C. Thomas’s column today here. What would you like to say to the Fairley band as they get ready for their bowl adventure?

A reader points out a flaw (just one?) in my Dec. 7 column about an emergency contracpetion giveaway:

While I very much appreciated your column on obtaining Plan B at the Memphis Regional Planned Parenthood center, there is a very serious error. It’s where you mention using Plan B “when the withdrawal method doesn’t go as the man planned.” Please let your readers know that the withdrawal method is not–IS NOT–ever a safe contraception measure.
Semen leaks from the penis whether or not the man withdrawals before ejaculation. Thus a woman is always in danger of getting pregnant during the withdrawal method–even if things go as planned.

Of course the letter writer, Terry Moon, a writer and self-described activist in the women’s liberation movement, is absolutely right. Planned Parenthood’s literature lists this as a method of birth control, but points out that if 100 women use this method for a year, 27 will get pregnant. I don’t know any woman who doesn’t want to get pregnant who would rely on this free, but highly unreliable method. I guess you get what you pay for.

The Guest Diva and metro columnist
Wendi C. Thomas

So you’re working your way through your Christmas list, but in Iraq and Afghanistan, Christmas must seem far, far away. Some of the women and men in the military don’t get regular mail, much less the supplies they need to get through the day (and we’re not talking about armor or ammunition).

Want to help? Have a look at Anysoldier.com, a site started by an Army Infantryman who’s done tours in both Iraq and Afghanistan. You’ll find lists of what our soldiers need — the site says letters from home are best — and how to get it to them. The site was last updated today, so the needs are current.

… And heartbreaking. Anyone have a service member in the Middle East? What do they love getting most?
Read the rest of this entry »

It has always surprised me to hear my girlfriends talk about how they never really expected to have to work. Not all of them think that, of course, but a surprisingly large number of them thought, at some point, that Prince Charming would sweep them out of their workaday world and plop them into a castle, glass slippers included. Or at least they thought that they’d have choice about staying home to take care of their kids while Daddy brought home the bacon.

Earlier this week I found the 21st Century iteration of that Cinderalla fantasy: Breadwinner wives. You know one, probably — those incredibly talented, driven, capable overachievers who fell in love with someone who will probably never top their earning potential, not to mention their motivation and drive. This fascinating column looks at what happens then, and how to handle the demise of your Cinderella dreams.

So much is at work here — long-held notions of what women are supposed to be laid on top of the I-can-have-it-all lessons of feminism. Tell me more: Are you one of those women who always expected someone would “take care” of her? If it hasn’t turned out that way, how do you feel about it? What do you know now about your expectations that you didn’t know then?

The holidays are sparkling at all kinds of parties, from the little cuties at the Jingle Bell Ball to Mayor Herenton’s cocktail party to the Alpha Phi Alpha celebration of their 100 years (left, representing LeMoyne Owen College, were, from left, Chauncey Davis, Kevin Fair and Jerome Heard.) Click here to read Michael Donahue’s column today, and here
for a link to the slide show, right. Merry, merry …