I actually HAVE a high school boy, and what I’ve found is that it doesn’t matter WHAT I tell him, he just rolls his eyes at me.

I’m sure you won’t have that problem.

(I’m off to think about this one some more…)

You should tell them that girls lie.

BUT

That girls are special, delicate and that they should treat them as such.

As a mom of girl and a boy that will be entering high school next year, I want them and their friends to understand that people are not disposable — whether it’s a “girlfriend/ boyfriend” or a best friend. It seems that in today’s society when you get bored with a relationship/person you throw them away and get a new one.

Good Luck! I’d love to see your final list.

I have 3 boys, still little, and everyday I try to do something to make sure that they don’t become those guys who have so much potential and then decide to not live up to it and say why try. Turn your intimidation into a little bit of anger, as if you were talking to your son when older and losing his way. I know so many amazing guys who, faced with a successful father, enabling mother and then a Type-A girlfriend- just don’t become the men that they need to become for themselves and their families. The old joke about the drummer applies to many men these days: What’s a drummer without a girlfriend: homeless. Look up Dr. Laura’s book called 10 things men do to mess up their lives- I haven’t actually read it, but I generally have found that she is fairly right about things, even if I don’t agree with them. Tell them that they will need to be the breadwinner in a difficult flat world where competition will be fierce, and so they will have to work hard. It is so much harder for men to make it compared to when their fathers made it, and we know they are up to the challenge. Tell them that they are the future leaders, that as much as we women will put out there that we can take care of everything–that in the end, we need to be able to raise our children and make a home, and we need them to take on the majority of the financial burdeon. Tell them how much money per day that different jobs really make, and how straight the path can be and some perspective on how to get there. Tell them to never let themselves get into debt or they’ll feel like slaves to their jobs. Tell them that having sex before marraige makes women feel used and confused about themselves and sometimes pregnant. Tell them that if they can hold out and find the right relationship, they will avoid alot of pain. Just some thoughts.

Teenage boys with raging hormones are not going to listen to much, but fortunately, my teenager is very well grounded. Not tooting my own horn, but I know that he got that way because of what I instilled in him from a toddler up to now. I’m proud to say that I have not had a minute of trouble out of him. No discipline problems whatsoever. No phone calls from teachers, parents, police, etc. I also think that he learned what not to do from observing others. Please tell the young men to always, always, always tell the truth, then you don’t have to remember what you said. It may not be the most popular thing to do amongst teenagers (they call it snitching…I hate that word!)but it will save you a world of heartache and pain. Tell them to treat women as they would treat their mother. Well, I guess that would work for most of them although I know some teenagers treat and talk to their mothers so disrepectful. You know the saying….”You can judge a man by the way he treats his mother”.

I’ve been thinking about this - I know it’s too late for your speech - but it took me a while to figure out what I wanted to say.

I work with teens a lot and talk to them. They aren’t inclined to listen to anything which sounds like yet another lecture.

I think if there’s one thing today’s teens need to hear and believe, it’s “This is not the best time of your life.” Older people say “These are the best years of your life,” to teens a lot, and it’s incredibly destructive. The teen years are awkward and painful for most people; if that’s as good as it gets, why live at all? And many teens decide not to. Suicide is a major cause of death among teenagers. Not to mention the various self-destructive behaviors teens engage in because they feel they have nothing to look forward to and nothing to lose.

There’s more to adult life than getting fat, wrinkled, and ugly and wearing ugly clothes, being married without passion, working very hard every day at a job you hate, calling lawn care a “hobby.” But those are the adult behaviors most children see modeled most often.

Adult life is infinite freedom to go places and do things, as long as you’ve laid the foundation for it in your youth. So, if you want a good adult life, the trick is to avoid making decisions as a teen which will limit you. Good grades = freedom to choose a career later. Not getting a girl pregnant = freedom to create the family you want as an adult. Most bad decisions are bad not because they annoy mom and dad, but because they hurt your future.