“Kleinmanns’ residence, Leanne speaking.”
Those are the words my parents taught me to use when they first let me answer the phone, when I was around the age my son is now. Of course, the calls were never for me, but answering the phone made me feel very grown-up, using my best manners to speak to what I usually discovered were total strangers.
How different the world is for my 8-year-old.
“Hey, Dad,” I heard him mumble into my cell phone last week. (Is it my imagination, or does he deliberately stop speaking clearly when he’s on the phone?) “Fine. Nothing. Yeah. Bye.”
Not for the first time, I realized how different his idea of phone communication is, even now, from the one I grew up with. Click HERE to read the rest of the column.
Responses to “Phone conversation, circa 2008.”
April 28th, 2008 at 9:28 am
Well, actually, my kid is young enough to use the phone only with supervision, but I’ve gotten a couple of outraged e-mails that question the wisdom of answering the phone with my name. To clarify: The greeting my parents taught me is, well, as old as I am, and no, I wouldn’t teach my kid to do the same. Though when it comes to answering my cell phone, if it’s someone I don’t know, I usually do say my name, just because I think it makes the conversation easier. In fact, even when I’m calling a friend, I usually tell them who I am, just to give them a minute to tune in to me and our conversation. I’ve taken plenty of calls in the middle of a busy day that caught me off guard, and I didn’t much like the feeling.
Thanks, though, for the comments!
April 28th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
When I read this in the paper I laughed out loud because my son uses a completely different voice to answer the phone. We’ll be talking and laughing and the phone will ring and he’ll jump to answer it, and it sounds like he should be on anti-depression meds: “Hullo.”
Then he proceeds to talk in monotone at a register at least two steps lower than his normal talking voice. It cracks me up. I’ve talked to him about it, but it’s like some reflex with him.
April 29th, 2008 at 4:40 am
The thing about etiquette is you don’t have to guess who’s right - because that’s the whole reason it exists, so that there’s a right way commonly agreed on, just like there’s a right way to spell words in the dictionary. This isn’t me versus you, or your parents versus my parents, it’s simply that the form of address you were taught is not correct for a private residence. You can look it up, really! The only time “Kleinmann residence,” would be correct is if you were a butler!
April 28th, 2008 at 2:09 am
It’s okay. Back in the day, your parents didn’t know what they were doing anyway.
The way of answering the phone you were taught is correct for businesses, not for private residences. You are under no obligation to arm possible strangers with your name - in fact the correct way of answering a telephone at a private residence is: “Hello?”
When making a private call, the caller identifies first and asks to speak to a particular individual: “This is Greg Jenkins, may I speak to Mrs. Kleinmann?” Then, if you know the caller, you can say you’re Leanne, and you’ll get her. If you don’t know the caller, and they didn’t ask to speak to someone, you say, “Who are you calling for?” (Or if your parents are grammar sticklers, ‘For whom are you calling?’) If the caller asks for someone other than you but fails to self-identify, you say, “Whom shall I say is calling?” And in no case do you give an explanation for why anyone can’t come to the phone - just “I’m sorry, she can’t come to the phone right now.”
There, now that the outdated etiquette lesson is out of the way - on to more modern etiquette: You let your kid text during dinner? Really?