I can’t remember where, but I recently read a discussing of specialization within families. You know, son makes the webpage, daughter knows where the keys to the lockbox are, dad programs the VCR and mom knows how to get red wine out of the tablecloth. Their take on it was that having different members of a family become specialists is not only inevitable, it allows the family as a whole to process much more information than if all members had to know everything. On the other hand, it’s part of the reason that someone who has recently been widowed or divorced feels so traumatized… studies have shown that for a time the remaining spouse actually tests as cognitively impaired, until they adjust to literally having a part of their “brain” gone.

In my family, we tend to break down along fairly traditional lines… when my husband needs to buy underwear he has to ask me his size, for example, and I also have to tell him which brand of bacon we buy and how long you cook asparagus. He is responsible for catching and removing spiders. He does the computer repairs. On the other hand, he won’t let me become helpless when it comes to electronics I use myself (he says its the first sign of senility), and for some reason I’ve ended up being the expert on power tools and car repair.